Girl, you must be an Oreo, I want your fillings so bad. 17. 28. 186. Because I want to eat you out until I get sick. 8. You dont need to go to Sephora for primer with the juices Ill produce. 30. 137. Would it be weird if I wanted to bang your brains out, or just that I didnt call you after? Well then let me put my head in your mouth. Are you butt dialing? Shall we see if Im allergic to your juices? #1. Sexual pickup lines. Because youre hot. Are you a racehorse? Do you like Krispy Kreme? I do not mind gaining more weight as long as you do it with me. Because youll be coming soon. Because Ive got some swimmers for you to swallow. 3. 10. F*** me if Im wrong, but dinosaurs still exist right? Are you a supermarket sample? If you dont like it, you could return it. Because I wanna split them apart and eat everything in between. Heck, if youre just browsing for some funny stuff to read you hit the jackpot as we had a fun time putting together these questions that you would ask someone you like out. 9. Why pay for a bra when I would gladly hold your boobs up all day for free? 176. Could I hide it inside of you? If we get to work now, we could have a fourth of July baby by next year. By the end of this post you will know what exactly NOT to say when meeting an attractive stranger. 74. Remember my name, because youll be screaming it later. 57. 125. I can make it fit. 1. 94. 120. Have you seen one? 26. You're so hot, I could bake cookies on you. 165. Because I want to swallow every last drop of you. 86. 154. 17. 126. Can I have cookie, and 2 scoops of you. 4. 3. Amen. 20. Can I check your pants? Im gonna have sex with you tonight so you might as well be there. You go down on me, and Ill owe you one. That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor tomorrow morning. 15. 55. Ill make like the repot man and smash your back doors in. I mean, besides me? Are you a bank loan? 23. I was going to get you a box of chocolates, but you already have a sweeter box. cause you are turning all these hoes on. Because Ive got some swimmers for you to swallow. Yes, with the right cookie pick up lines, you can make your crush smile and show them that you are interested in them. Im no weather man, but you can expect more than a few inches tonight. 15. 4. Also, share these with your friends; who knows, you might do a fun bet or a social experiment with them. Fuck me if Im wrong, but dinosaurs still exist right? I can tell youre into yoga, why dont you spend a little time showing me just how flexible you are? Cause Im not doing you but I definitely should be. Fucking unscrewing the wine, just screw me instead. These are good pick up lines that you could actually use, and they may do the trick! Are you from China? The 55 Very Dirty Pick Up Lines. Id say God bless you, but it look like He already did. If I don't come in 30 minutes, the next one is free. Im an astronaut and my next mission is to explore Uranus. Im not into watching sunsets, but Id love to see you go down. Darling I will supply you with stash of sweets and my never ending love for you. 6. Im scared of getting pregnant, so do you want to go up to my room and help me test all my condoms? Want to find out what the best thing you can do with your lips is. Babe I am the best cookies that you will ever have, if you rub me the right way Ill crumb for you. Can you put your hair into pigtails for me? This saying is primarily suitable if you are a man. How long has it been since your last checkup? You, however. 63. Because I want you on my face. Are you feeling daring and adventurous in your pursuit of love? Dont tell me what to do unless your naked. And I don't love chocolate. . 39. Before you leave, how about knowing how strong is your dating profile? No? I know a great way to burn off the calories in that drink. Because I'd happily feel you up. 16. My tongue could do a better job of teasing you than my words can. Did you send the invitation to the party between your legs in the post or do you wanna give it to me in person? Is your last name s*icide? You make me hot and wet. 14. Because I would like to purchase a sweet like you. Beauty is only skin deep, but my d___ goes in deeper. Because im crumbling for you. 94. 56. 153. 173. Why dont you surprise your roommate and not come home tonight? 132. You are so sexy, you turn my pickle into a fresh cucumber. 55. Take advantage of these awesome pick up lines using Oreos cookies. 2. And I dont think youre beautiful, I think youre beyond it. Lil Wayne. Because there's nothing else like you on Earth! Hey girl, is your name winter? 9. You could put all the sweets business if you will be consistently sweet like that. Congratulations! You know what I like in a girl? Remember, not everyone will appreciate a dirty pickup line, so be respectful and know when to back off. 9. Showing 1 to 52 of 52 entries See which dirty pick-up line below brings you the most luck. 8. A part of me is tense and I think youre perfect for easing it. 106. The best thing to hold onto in life, is Oreos and me. Do you have pet insurance? 35. 21. Or as a joke, a very stupid joke. Dirty Pick Up Lines That Will Make You Cringe! 37. Do you go to church often? 71. For you I can be 100% made of sugar so that I will be enough sweet for you. There is something wrong with my cell phone. Ive been banned from playing Tapped Out. How about a BJ? 70. I find your lack of nudity disturbing. Your bra doesnt look like it fits, do you want to try the free fitting service back at my place? 27 Energy Drink Pick Up Lines. Are you Da Baby because Lesssss Gooooooo out on a date. 100. I'm just like a pore strip. Whats the entry fee for your grand leg opening event? 3. I broke my leg falling for you. 133. Hey girl, are you a cookie? With our AI-trained on 10,000+ pictures rated by hot girls and dating experts, we can help you to choose your best pics and stand out. 5. Are you ready? Can I have yours? You with all those curves and Im the car with no breaks ooohhh -Drake. So do you take contactless payment or is it cash only? Was your father an alien? Your legs are like an Oreo cookie. Babe, you are so hot, you made my soft dough into a tough cookie. You remind me of a bunch of Oreo. Feel my shirt. Because I want to take your top off and gobble you up. Dont worry, you can pay in kind. Could you turn me on? Are you a drill sergeant? 103. 144. Would you like some? Darn, it must be an hour fast. 108. If you will allow me I would like to consume you everyday because I like the taste of you. Because I could see you lion in my bed tonight. Boy I can make you melt in my mouth and in my hand like chocolate. Just so you know I have a ref full of chocolate, a couch and good films at my house. My doctor told me I have a vitamin D deficiency. My tongue still craves your kind of sweet baby. Do you work at Build-a-Bear? You can be the pasta and Ill let you mix yourself up with my balls. So youre not into casual sex? 72. Want to see a movie or do you want to make one? Id love to kiss those beautiful, luscious lips. Thats a nice smile. Dont worry about drinking your calories, Ill help you burn them off. -Jeremih. Lets play a game; Ill be the trampoline and you can bounce on me. 5. 31. Required fields are marked *. 189. There is something wrong with my cell phone. 140. Im jealous of your heart because its pumping inside you and Im not. I promise Im not like what youre used to. Would you like to try an Australian kiss? 52 Cookie Pick Up Lines. Go out with me. 22. 88. These dirty pick-up lines are really very good, funny, cheesy, dirty, etc. 7. You have this ability to make me so happy like only sweet foods can do. 158. 32. Tinder and Hinge are the exclusive registered trademark of Match Group, LLC. Kissing burns 2 calories per minute. Because I should definitely be doing you, but Im not. 91. 97. Because your ass is calling to me. Let's play carpenter. I thought of you while having chocolate cake, because you are just too sweet. If you have any questions, please dont hesitate to get in touch. 13. 51. 48. You look sad, let me sprinkle some of good vibes at you baby. You should sell hotdogs because you already know how to make a weiner stand. 130. My dicks been feeling a little dead lately. 62. Do you work at a tech store because you turned my software into hardware. Unique Dirty Pick-Up Lines to get Laid for Sure, How To Ask A Girl Out On Hinge With Confidence, The Best Questions To Ask On Hinge: Build Meaningful Connections, How To Start A Conversation on Hinge: The Ultimate Guide (2023 Edition). Girl, you make me want to dive into that sea that pus-sea. Ill be Burger King, and you be McDonalds. Smooth romantic pick up lines. If you were ice cream and i was chocolate sauce, I'd pour my love all over you! You wont be able to leave the house for few days. That's the thing. 21 Do you have a pencil? Because your pussys getting smashed tonight. Our vending machine & snack pickup lines may also help you. 22. What time do they open? My love for you is like diarrhea. 118. 156. 11. Are you from Tennessee? Automated page speed optimizations for fast site performance. 25. Sugar is sweet, I bet that p_____ is too. Now, bend over and cough. I would only kick you out of bed to f*ck you on the floor. 4. Cause I want to get you wet and do you all night long. You're going to have that body for the rest of your life, and I just want it for one night. RELATED: 65 Cheesy Pick Up Lines For Laughs. 120. Are your legs made of Nutella? 8. If its true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning. 85. If I were your captain, Id soon make your nipples stand to attention. Hey, you want to eat cookies and watch Netflix? Complement and be funny at the same time. You could lick my white cream any time. Babe you look absolutely better when you take that wrapper off of you. Mario is Red, Sonic is Blue. Have you ever wondered why Dating apps are working for your friends but not you? My fridge is full of your favorite breakfast food for when you wake up underneath me. 6. Do you have a cell phone in your back pocket? Use these chocolate related pick up lines about different types of chocolate like candy bars, donuts, cake, drinks, and more. I will give you a kiss. 36. My magical watch says youre not wearing any panties? Lets play Barbie. When I saw you, I lost my tongue. Because I would follow you everywhere. 79. 151. Fuck me if Im wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right? If only the sweets tastes like you then I would definitely start to love them. Want to share this lovely candy bar with me and possibly a lifetime? Cause I can see myself in them. How many drinks will it take for you to sit on my face? There will only be 7 planets left after I destroy Uranus. Nibbling is not enough, know that I want to devour you fast. 7. I dont think I want your babies, but I wouldnt mind refining my baby making technique with you. What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? 82. Do you have cookies? If I was your teacher Id give you the D. 151. 93. Find something that makes you laugh and maybe itll actually work. You can call me food because, trust me, You need me inside you. When that happens, instead of getting laid like you want, youll end up with a drink sloshed onto your face. Oh damn I never knew having you would give me the good kind of cavities. We could workout sometime. 22. Use these cookie pick up lines to help you flirt and impress the men or women. Are you a farmer? Want to feel my personalized cookies? Youre just like a wine tasting. . While these lines may not be for the faint of heart, they can add humor and flirtatiousness to your conversations. Hey, do you wanna be my hope? Im like a Rubiks Cube; the more you play with me, the harder I get. I dont like sweets but baby you are an exception to that rule. Because the more I play with you the harder you get. Hey girl, are you a cookie? I feel better already with you holding my hand, sweets arent even needed. Let only latex stand between our love. Liquor is not the only hard thing around here. 5. If you are a woman, you may need to improvise and replace things when using this saying. With you, I want to F. 147. 139. Its nice and sweet. You know, if I were you, Id have sex with me. 127. Hi, Im a burglar and Im going to smash your back door in. I hope you have pet insurance because Im about to destroy your p***y. 31 Honey Pick Up Lines. 1 If we were socks we would make the perfect pair. You can be the door; then I can slam you all I want. 1. Want to make a cocktail? Excuse me, I am about to go masturbate and needed a name to go with the face. 153. There's . Do you have a shovel? Dirty Pick Up Lines That Might Get You Into Trouble I'm not usually into hunting, but I'd love to catch you and mount you all over my house. Are you a drill sergeant? Dirty pick up lines are such an in-demand topic. Darling you are enough sweet for me. If you were Kim Jung Un youd have no problem making me stand to attention. Are you into alternative therapies? Cookie Pick Up Lines 1. Because I see me filling you up with my nuts. I will not ever need sweets if I already have you in my life. The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fuck you on the floor. Make out with me if I am wrong, but isn't the Earth flat? They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. But also express how you feel in a fun and creative way. All the fortune cookies in the world led me to you. Im out of a job at the minute, but Ill happily volunteer for you. Easy Copy & Paste! Because you'll be coming soon. If kisses were snowflakes, I'd send you a blizzard. 24. 135. 125. 113. 74. Because I want to eat you out until I get sick. These funny and extra sweet pineapple pickuplines will get your love to mix and open up for you. Oh sorry, I forgot the D. Ill give you that later. We should play strip poker. 124. Because youre making me want to go down. If you were a part of my house, youd be in the basement. Because Id Stuff you. This profile review will finally allow you to know how to make your profile more attractive, and get more matches and dates with people you really like. One of my friends told me girls hate oral, do you wanna help me prove him wrong? 68. You looking mighty fine with that double stuffed ass. Youll be the most popular girl in the office with the moves Ill teach you. Now that you have these cheesy pick up lines ready to go, add these flirty knock-knock jokes . Because youve got some big, round, beautiful melons. Itll look better if it was all you were wearing! I'm like Domino's Pizza. Are you a Seargent? I want to go swimming, but Im already drowning in your eyes. If so, I can stop them for 9 months. I'm a bird watcher, and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher. Cause practice makes perfect. Because youll be coming soon. Savage smooth pick up line. How about we make sure were even with them? Babe I am so happy to see you, and this is definitely not a chocolate bar in my pants. Girl youre like a ganache cause you make this cake better just like you make my day better. 8. Can you survive with nothing but one bag? Are you a cookie? 31 Snack Pick Up Lines. 16. Is your dad Osama because you are the bomb! because I love to travel. Does your dad own a chocolate factory? 12. 58. Your smile is like a sugar cookie. My zipper. I like milk and cookies but I would rather have you. 170. 15. Can you tell me what time your legs open, please? 60. Perhaps you're looking to add a little spice to your romantic interactions? 33. 2. Are you a parking ticket because youve got fine written all over you. I find them hot and leave them wet. Smooth cheesy pick up lines. Some are a bit dirtier then others and some are more direct. Use these chocolate related pick up lines about different types of chocolate like candy bars, donuts, cake, drinks, and more. Cause I love when youre on top of me. 109. Cause I heard nobodys perfect. Darn, it must be an hour fast. I just checked the weather report, and there's a 95% chance you're getting six inches tonight. Well, Im European and Ill let you come with me for free. For driving all these guy/girls crazy. 66 Frozen Yogurt and Ice Cream Pick Up Lines, 147 Deli Pick Up Lines (Meat Cold Cut, Cheese, Bread, Sandwich). Ill kiss you in the rain so you get twice as wet. You make my heart melt faster than hot chocolate. Your email address will not be published. Babe you want some Oreo? Hey girl, I'm a fully-fledged meteorologist and something's telling me you're in for a few inches tonight. Because I can see your wood. Do you run track? 21. Tails, youre mine. 20. Babe, we are cookies together. Bridal Shower 101 is an affiliate of Amazon Services, LLC. 17. It involves bodily fluids. Shakira was wrong, Im definitely confusing. Im not into watching sunsets, but Id love to see you go down. 2. 18. What has four legs and doesnt have the most beautiful girl on it? I only wanted a weeks supply of sweets instead I got a lifetime supply because I got you. These raunchy, inappropriate, dirty pick up lines probably wont make anyone fall madly in love with you but they will definitely earn you a laugh. Cookies are a delicious treat we all enjoy, but do you know they can also be used to flirt and impress your crush? 10. Look no further than this article on the dirtiest pick-up lines! Im not a waitress, but Ill take your tip. Hes Being Hot & Cold: Reasons Why & What To Do AboutIt, Best Narcissism And Gaslighting Movies, TV Shows, And Books Thatll Blow YourMind, Make This The Year You Change Your Life With Brianna Wiests New Daily MeditationBook, 75+ Dirty Yo Mama Jokes That Always Get A Laugh in2023, When I Try To Put Into Words How Much My Mom Means ToMe, Barbie, Shrek 5, And A New Harry Potter TV ShowHeres What You Might HaveMissed. 2. Because you have my privates standing at attention. 16. Because youre gonna be on your knees tonight. So take a chance, and see where your daring nature takes you! Ive got a mouthwash you can use any time of the day. 42. Because I want to check you out. 6. I need you like the cookie monster needs cookies. Can I put yours in my mouth? Roses are red, violets are blue, lava is hot and so are you. You are like a box full of sweet that I cannot get hands off. 12. 150. Lets go to my place and do some math. 16. I might not be going down town later, but hopefully Ill be going down on you. Because you're gonna, be on your knees tonight. Baby you light up my mood like the way chocolate can. I hear the best cure for headaches is sex. 4. I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package. Your email address will not be published. If you look that good in clothes, you must look even better out of them. Your legs are like an Oreo Cookie. 54. Because I want you to spread for my satisfaction tonight. 37. Because I heard you Relay want this dick. Head at my place, tail at yours. Can you be my mocha? 21. 104. Want to fix that? Most of these funny dirty pick up lines are for guys, but we managed to get a few for women to use. 7. Here's a funny-meme list of the most cringy pick up lines ever created. It's 2023, and with modern advancements in technology, it's never been easier to go on dates. 12. This blog post was all about dirty pick up lines. Do you have an inhaler? $20.00. Tell your boobs to stop staring at my eyes. 143. One that comes with a solid a___ grab. 2. Let's play house. 70. Because I swear that ass is calling me. Because youve got my privates standing at attention. 115. 131. Can you do telekinesis? Did you grow up on a chicken farm? Because you are as sweet as chocolate. Do you want a piece of this cookie? Is it hot in here? I can see into the future, and yeah, were gonna fuck at least once. Because you just gave me a raise. If I could rearrange the alphabet Id put you an I together. Were like hot chocolate and marshmallows. Do you like it dark or milky? 5. 123. Youre on my list of things to do tonight. I wanna do you after school like some homework. January Nelson is a writer, editor, and dreamer. A balanced diet, is an Oreo in each hand. Did you get your license suspended? Because Im digging that ass. Im scared of getting pregnant, so do you want to go up to my room and test all of my condoms. My name isn't Elmo, but you can tickle me any time you want to. 7. 1. If I flip a coin, what are my chances of getting head? Your smile is almost as big, warm, and lovely as my penis. 44. There are no chairs left. 27. I'd love to kiss those beautiful, luscious lips. Can you press play so you can be my player 2? What has four legs and doesn't have the most beautiful girl on it? Because I put the D in Raw. 116. 96. 160. Did you feel that? 5. 149. My dick. I wanna split them and eat all the good stuff in the middle. Do you like pies? I love going down under. 81. 2. Youre going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one night. I feel like I went to heaven full of chocolate upon getting a taste of you. "Heard you like bad girls, well I'm bad at everything." 79. I aint using Google no more cause when I saw you, my search was over. Whether you've been chatting with a girl for a while or you are just . Are you related to Dracula? 115. You look so good; I wanna kiss your lips and move up to your belly button. 34. 9. 39. You look half fine, half mine. Because you just cured my erectile dysfunction. Ouch you are giving me a good kind of toothache just because of your sweetness. I do not need a ganache on my cake because you are enough sweet for me. 76. Dear I would pour all the sweetness I have in my body towards you to make you happy. Girl, I am like an Oreo, the best stuff is on the inside. 122. because I want to commit to you. You know, I would die happy if I saw you naked just once! Dont believe me? Are you chocolate spread? 19. 15. 104. I want to take all my breaks talking to you. Cause Im China suck your _______. I just wanna drive it once again. Will you accept my cookies? If Im a pain in your ass We can just add more lubricant. This is a long shot, but are you single? Sirius' light is nothing compared to yours. 147. Want an Australian kiss? 58. 3. Tell your boobs to stop staring at my eyes. 67. And perhaps some cookies. My bed. Im no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bed rock. 16. Would you grab my arm so I can tell my friends Ive been touched by an angel? Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor. 180. Hey girl, Im a fully-fledged meteorologist and somethings telling me youre in for a few inches tonight. I would tell you a joke about my penis, but its too long. Youre my sunshine and my rain. 36. So, if your pick-up line is funny, make sure you don't end up roasting them. I may not go down in history, but Ill go down on you. We go together like Cookies and Milk. Cause without you Id die. I like my cocoa maragnan just like I like my nights full of flavor because of you. How about I make you happy this time? because youll be choking on the D. 72. Girl are you an iceberg? Hearst Owned. Are you flappy bird? 7. Have you ever been to Europe? Would you like to try an Australian kiss? Lie down on that couch and pretend your legs hate each other. 2. Get Access to *All* of Cosmo. Im feeling a little off today. Hilariously Smooth Pick-Up Lines. Im pretty bad at swimming, can I use your assets as a buoyancy aid? This site is NOT endorsed by or affiliated with any dating apps. Can I take you on a ate? 8. 75. You might use themes related to cookie monster, fortune cookie, oreo cookie, girl scout cookie, sugar & chocolate cookies, cookie dough, and more. 2. When you cant think of anything clever to say, steal these dirty pick up lines. Your legs are like an Oreo. Because I want to erase your past and write our future. Because Id love to spread them. Im like a firefighter. These werent exactly smooth pick-up lines but they are worth a shot for funny jokes. The fastest person to take their clothes off wins. Cause Im about to steal your heart. Because youve made a part of me move without even touching it. 49. 57. Staring at you is better than looking at freshly baked cookies. Youre so hot Id suck the farts out of your ass. Hey, you wanna do a 68? Easy Copy & Paste! I lost my keys Can I check your pants? There will be only 7 planets left after I destroy Uranus. Does your job blow? 4. Are you the sun, cause you light up my day? 13. Your body is a wonderland, I just want to be Alice. Easy Copy & Paste! Cause Jurass-is-sick. 38. Is your name nobody? You must be Medusa because you make me rock hard. Should I f___ you like a good girl or a bad one? Im sorry Ill have to rip it apart. 19. 87. Im just like a pore strip. That dress looks great on you as a matter of fact, so would I. Because I'm going to scream when I'm in you. 128. Can you sleep with me? Are you my homework? Best R-Rated Dirty Pick-Up Lines. Id love to be that cookie youre eating because they have the excuse to get close to your lips. They say to spit, but I always prefer swallowing. Because I know some good karma-sutra positions. We go together naturally like marshmallows go with chocolate. If I dont come in 30 minutes, the next one is free. Like the onion on my sandwich, I wanna take you out. Pick-up lines are all about making your partner feel special, so they know you like them. Kissing is the language of love, do you mind starting a conversation? 122. I am always ready for something sweet like you. Someone vacuum my lap, I think this girl needs a clean place to sit. Hey, I aint no cashier, but you got a couple things I want to check out. I dont know about you but sharing this bar with you feels absolutely right. Sit on my face, and Ill eat my way to your heart. 4. Hard to get off, but extremely satisfied once you do. cause you sure know how to raise a c*ck. I think my allergies are acting up. My biology teacher told me that the lips are the most sensitive part of the body, wanna find out if she was right? Hi, Im wasted but this condom in my pocket doesnt have to be. The only favorite thing I have in this cruel world aside from sweets is having you in my life. You are so sweet, I would eat you over chocolate any day. 11. 77. However, it's important to tread carefully and be mindful of the signals you're receiving. Are those jeans Guess? Im a mind reader, and yes, I will sleep with you. WARNING: These dirty pick up lines are extremely inappropriate and NSFW. When I met you my craving for something sweet stop. 9. 5. 20. 98. Youre just like a wine tasting. If so, then go ahead and let your adventurous side shine through with a risqu quip. Founded in 2010, Thought Catalog is owned and operated by The Thought & Expression Company, Inc. For over a decade, we've been at the bleeding edge of media, pioneering an infrastructure for creatives to flourish both artistically and financially. Am i enough for you? I have tourettes and only a good fuck will cure me. From cheeky one-liners to bold come-ons, we've compiled a list of the most effective dirty pick-up lines to help you make a memorable first impression. Flirting with yoShare your love for Oreo cookies with oreo pick up line. That's a beautiful smile, but it'd look even better if it were all you were wearing. Are you butt dialing? You be the 6, and Ill be the 9. 14. I like my coffee how I like my woman creamed. 45. 132. 11. Did you grow up on a chicken farm? I hope youre a plumber, because youve got my pipe leaking. 26. 93. I can think of an activity for us to do that rhymes with muck. I'm afraid of the dark, and my nightlight went out last night. 4. You make my day complete just by getting a whiff of you. 30. This may seem corny, but you make me really horny. I wish you were soap so I could feel you all over me. They said pythons werent allowed. Its like a french kiss, but down under. You wanna know which hug is the best hug? Do you believe in karma? You could be the ocean and Ill go down on you. I want to wear you like a pair of sunglasses One leg over each ear. Have you been baking cookies. Sometimes I like to pretend Im the Titanic. They call me coffee because I grind so fine. 116. Yolo, you obviously love Oreos and I do too. Tell you what? You should sell hotdogs, because you already know how to make a wiener stand. I dont have a Ferrari. 17. Are you a pirate? Take this 2-min test to boost your dating profile for good . I hope in all the stars that you and I will not have any expiration date. Because I can sea you lion in my bed tonight. What time do your legs open? 7. Do you need a stud in your life? The condom in my pocket goes out of date tomorrow, so why dont you help me use it? Ive recently qualified as a gynecologist and Id like to offer you my pro-boner services. Do you like trampolines? Because Id love to tap that ass. Because youre giving me wood. You can call me cake, because Ill go straight to your ass.
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